I GOT ME A JOB

sassysharpshooter:

(pending a drug test but I’m sober as a pip)

IT’S NOT MINIMUM WAGE WHICH IS WHAT EVERYONE ELSE WAS OFFERING

ASH IS COMING OVER THIS WEEKEND

THIS IS A GOOD DAY



glossynympheteyes:

this movie is so fucking creepy jesus fuck




jbkats:

"paramore was pulled off tour for a week when hayley was 16 because her mom grounded her" is the funniest thing i’ve ever heard


nootdoot:

nootdoot:

what’s the cleanest genre of tv show?

soap operas



4gifs:

Trying to get homework done. [via mrorangeguy]


atomicairspace:

copperbooms:

when did tumblr collectively decide not to use punctuation like when did this happen why is this a thing

it just looks so smooth I mean look at this sentence flow like a jungle river


  • Satan: [appears]
  • Satan: You can have anything you wan--
  • Me: LANGUAGE.
  • Satan: What?
  • Me: GIVE ME EVERY LANGUAGE.
  • Satan: What the--?
  • Me: YOU SAID ANYTHING. GIVE ME EVERY LANGUAGE IN THE WORLD.
  • Satan: Wouldn't you rather have love or money?
  • Me: EVERY. LANGUAGE. MASTERY OF EVERY LANGUAGE. NOW.

gingerhaze:

And something about a lizard person.



treasure:

how to take a test: cry on the paper and the choice closest to your tear is the answer


nosdrinker:

Avril Lavigne said “lololol” in an official press release